Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Mission: Stamp out inner clutterbug


Saturday night, I sat on the parquet floor, cross legged and dejected. I had just come to the realization that I was a clutterbug.

R: What's wrong?
I already knew the answer, but I asked anyway.
me: Am I a clutterbug?
R: Yes, but that's why I'm here, to clean up after you.
me: But, you shouldn't have to! I will try to be better.
R: Mmmhmmm.... (all sassy-like)
me: What?! You don't believe me?!
R: No, I believe you, but you might forget to try.

The next morning I woke up with a mission. I tackled our junk drawer --almost every drawer is a junk drawer-- but this one was particularly bad. I had purchased a drawer organizer a while back and crap had accumulated both underneath it and over it. The little plastic tray was suspended in a sea of shit. Then, I organized our pantry and recycled a million shopping bags. After seeing that mountain of bags, I'm really going to try to get better about using our canvas bags. Ugh. Gross.

"Houston, we have a bag problem."
only 2/3rds pictured


Get off your lazy ass and do these things:
  • De-clutter/polish nightstands
  • Clean out lower kitchen cabinets
  • Throw out my busted Montel Williams blender, RIP  (returned to manufacturer!)
  • Organize kitchen drawers
  • Rearrange dining room bookshelf
  • Create stationery/ephemera station in office
  • Finish organizing letters
  • Clean out closet bins
  • Purge clothes unworn in the past year (2?)
  • Refold clothes on shelves
  • Make a Goodwill donation run
  • Clean out bathroom cabinets/drawers
  • Organize hall "linen" closet currently housing DVDs, CDs, & 7"s
  • Organize guest bedding
  • Sort/throw out dog toys
Okay. I think that's it. That's the road to a cleaner, meaner me. The path to minimalist heaven. I know this makes for mega dry reading, but I figure if I make a public declaration here, then I will be held accountable. I'll be referring to this site and may need to call in the troops (just kidding). Wish me luck!

6 comments:

  1. oh my!
    Good for you Gracie.
    I have an incredible urge to purge now.
    I have too many overstuffed goodwill bags piling up. I need to make a trip to their donation truck but it's next door to a KFC and I know I'll have to make a biscuit run.

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  2. Montel Williams blender?!!!? wow!!!!!

    if you can make a list like this, you are half-way there!

    and i have a theory: people are either hoarders or chuckers. i'm a chucker. sometimes this is good; sometimes not.

    well, i hoard some stuff too, so there goes my theory. :(

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  3. Yeah - I want to see this Montel blender!!! Please? Add to your list to come declutter my house too... thanks!

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  4. the view from my bedroom window is my neighbor's upstairs deck and i just realized it looks EXACTLY like Grey Gardens. you know where they sit outside all the time. super eerie. i will have to take a picture and send it to you.

    btw. have you seen the new show Hoarders? wow.

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  5. This is my first time commenting, but I lalalove your blog. You are funny and thoughtful and stylish and you love your parents. You are like a more eloquent version of myself ♥

    I need to de-clutter too! I have 2 weeks off before grad school resumes. Can I make a monument out of this mess? We shall see.

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  6. dear melody,
    HAHAHAHA, KFC!!! i made a baby step and put the 1 year old goodwill bags into my trunk. i WILL go this weekend. i will, i will! either that or i WILL be wasting gas, hauling around all this junk. hehe.
    love, gracie
    -------------------

    dear droll,
    yes, montel has failed me. that mother effer. last time i'll buy a product from him again! i had only used it 3times before it shorted out my kitchen and fried itself. grr. oh well, easy come, easy go, right? i hear you about the hoarder/chucker dichotomy. i hoard until i breakdown (like now, and chuck!)
    love, gracie
    -------------------

    dear waxy,
    here it is, in all it's glory. i just saw the "100 year warranty" on the site. haha. maybe i should pursue further. i will add your house to the list if i make it out of mine alive!
    love, gracie
    -------------------

    dear jayne,
    i would love to see your neighbor's GG deck! i have not seen hoarders, only read about it on the unclutterer.com. i think i may have to tivo that shit. but i'm afraid it might give me anxiety! eeks.
    xoxoxo, gracie
    -------------------

    dear lisa ann,
    go on.... just kidding...THANK YOU!!!!! your comment brightened my entire day. how nice of you to shower me with such nice words. what a treat! i think you should do it while you have the time. you can start your new semester with a clear home/clear mind! so nice to comment-meet you!
    love, gracie

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The divine PB&J in me, salutes the divine PB&J in you.