Friday, August 13, 2010

It's a Party!

R says to me each week,
"Spoiler alert! The gay one gets kicked off."
And every week, I pee a little.
Mondo. Mondo. Mondo. The short shorts. The knee socks.
Tears will be shed the day he gets auf'ed.
Can you believe the little fucker is 32?!?
Tim Gunn is drunk the entire episode.
That or huffing glue in the green room. "I prefer woolly balls." 
Bright pink face to match his shirt. Feeling tingly.
Andy or Onch?!?
The dress is fucking hot.
The balloon glove does it.
Peach is like the culmination of every cranky
middle aged white woman I've ever met.
I do like how her name is Peach though. The irony!
Gretchen.
Don't get me started.
Smug Portland hipster. Meh.
Kors never fails to deliver the nasally biatchiness.
"She looks like a transvestite flamenco dancer at a funeral."
Oh snap.
Betsey Johnson is lucky she's a millionaire,
otherwise she'd just be another old crackwhore.
"Too beautiful" my ass.
OMFG.
Is this the first season that Heidi "The Most Fertile Woman in the Universe" Klum has not been pregnant in?!

15 comments:

  1. I love Tim. Don't say shit about Tim.

    And I liked Andy's glove, but I didn't think that dress was flattering.

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  2. i love tim, too!!! but he was definitely acting weird this episode.

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  3. He was in a GOOD MOOD, weirdo. He likes the crazy challenges.

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  4. I'm going to go watch this on daily motion now. I thought episode two was hilarious. I love Mondo - he's like that McLovin off Superbad.

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  5. Rofl, this post made me laugh and I needed a good laugh.

    "Betsey Johnson is lucky she's a millionaire,
    otherwise she'd just be another old crackwhore.
    "Too beautiful" my ass." <= Awesome!

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  6. Can I brag and say I knew Mondo when I was living in Denver? We weren't tight or anything, but I'd see him all over the place.
    A girl I went to highschool with is a professional b-list dancer and told me that Peach always designs her performance costumes. I think that says scores...
    And ugh, Gretchen. Smug indeed, and I hate it that I love her clothes so much.

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  7. Sooo with you on the Heidi breeding situation.
    She needs to stop it.
    Send her the 'world is overpopulated' memo
    Takes me 2 hours to go 13 miles on the freeways these days. Why?
    Too many effing people

    xt

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  8. i spotted betsey johnson at the foo-foo gourmet store at the stanford shopping center when i was in college. i poked my boyfriend and stage-whispered: "THAT'S BETSEY JOHNSON!" he stage-whispered back: "BEHIND THE HOMELESS LADY?"

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  9. melina, yes. totally brag worthy. brag on, sister.

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  10. I NEED A T.V. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M MISSING IT

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  11. lauren, yes yes yes.

    tracy, i know, riiiiight? stop banging seal already. sheesh!

    mary, i think these are all online!

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  12. I'll get on that right now.

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  13. Dudes, I don't get to watch this for like, another 2 fucking years. The UK sucks. Luckily my memory sucks too so even though you bastards will tweet and blog the arse off the series, I won't remember a thing come summer 2012 when I finally get to watch it.

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  14. How funny.....I knew Mondo wayyyyyy back in the day. We were ravers together. He hasn't aged a bit. I was really excited to see a Denver person on the show. 'Bout time.
    Loved this post. Gretchen drives me bonkers. I just really want Casanova to go home. For some reason he gets under my skin in a BAD way but at least he does give M. Kors the opportunity for some great put downs. God bless Project Runway.

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  15. I love how everyone's hating gretchen. ha! and casanova is creeping me out, he needs to go. Tim was excellent in this episode!

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The divine PB&J in me, salutes the divine PB&J in you.